


So Close and Yet So Far

by ThatBohoFemme



Category: World Wrestling Entertainment
Genre: Angst, Discussions of reconciliation, Facing The Truth, Facing the past, Lying to yourself, M/M, Memories, Post-Break Up, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-09
Updated: 2018-03-09
Packaged: 2019-03-29 04:02:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13918965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatBohoFemme/pseuds/ThatBohoFemme
Summary: Dean's tried to quit Seth.There's some force tying them together. Try as he might, Dean cannot shake it. He cannot shake the feeling that they are supposed to be. He cannot shake the feeling that they belong together.Seth comes around whenever he can, essentially courting. He's looking to reignite the flame they once shared. He senses the same thing Dean does. He wants it back.Once upon a time, they had been something. Once upon a time, they had dreamed of forever together.Then, The Authority came into play, filling Seth's head with grandiose ideas of fame and fortune and the illustrious career he would have.





	So Close and Yet So Far

_**“Sometimes you have to lie. But to yourself you must always tell the truth.”  
– Harriet, Harriet the Spy by Louise Fitzhugh (1964)** _

Dean's tried to quit Seth. 

There's some force tying them together. Try as he might, Dean cannot shake it. He cannot shake the feeling that they are supposed to be. He cannot shake the feeling that they belong together. 

Seth comes around whenever he can, essentially courting. He's looking to reignite the flame they once shared. He senses the same thing Dean does. He wants it back. 

Once upon a time, they had been something. Once upon a time, they had dreamed of forever together. 

Then, The Authority came into play, filling Seth's head with grandiose ideas of fame and fortune and the illustrious career he would have. 

God, Dean hates them for that. All Seth's ever wanted was to prove himself; Show the world not to count out the Iowa boy with the big dreams. 

The Authority prayed upon those fears, essentially destroying them and any hope of their future. 

People urge him to give Seth a second chance. Roman sees it, regularly trying to convince Dean he deserves a chance at happiness. Dean always smiles sadly and just shakes his head. 

He doesn't feel that way about Seth anymore. 

It's a total lie. It's a front he puts on for the rest of the world. It's a front he's tried desperate to convince himself is real. 

His heart knows the truth his mind's too stubborn to admit. 

He _loves_ Seth. He wants nothing more than to spend all of eternity together. Yet, he's afraid of putting himself out there. 

He almost lost himself last time. 

Sometimes, he sits up at night, watching old matches. He's eager to learn as much as he can from his past experiences. There's one match in particular that he can't stop watching no matter what he tries. 

_Summerslam 2014._

To be honest, Dean doesn't remember much of that match. He was so emotional that he acted on autopilot. He watches the match as a way to remember. 

_I loved you._

He doesn't remember saying this just before he stomped Seth's head into the mat. Even watching it 3 and a half years later, he just remembers the pain. It's odd. He doesn't remember the motion. He doesn't remember the words. He remembers the pain. 

One night, he's watching the match probably for the nineteenth time. As he gets to the moment just before the curb stomp (12 minutes and 20 seconds into the match), he finds himself starting to shake. He sees his lips move on the screen and it's almost as if he's back in the moment. 

Tears fill his eyes. He tries to blink them back, not giving into the surges of pain. Finally, he curls into a ball, making sure his bad arm is on top. He gives in to the tears and realizes the truth. 

_He still loves Seth._

As the tears subside and reality becomes clear once more, Dean realizes the dilemma he's now in but subtly grateful he's telling the truth to himself, even if he's still lying to everyone else. 

Does he continue lying to the world, even if he knows the truth? Does he take a chance? 

What's a guy in his situation supposed to do?

-fin-


End file.
